Klogger

 As I wish it is my last breath the heavy air that flows in and as hard it is to inhale I wish it is my last breath. The heaviness in the atmosphere and the energy of the room as if im inhaling some poison, the pain in chest that doesnt cease to stop and work in the lungs that has hard time itself. I saw your silhouette from the distance, I couldnt believe my eyes I had to to double check myself and couldnt believe my reality When I was sure it was you, my gut filled in with disgust My body stopped breathing for a while, somehow I collected myself As I walked besides, behind you, I couldnt help by loathe myself. When my eyes stopped cursing you, gasp "yep! Im gonna kill myself" I cant recongnize the person youve become, I dont want you in my life my life immaculately destructed right before my eyes Should I be thanking you as the time I gave myself is creeping in I got one year left, I despise myself nothing change in between more time passes by, I loathe the air we breath it...

 Let's talk about the trauma of me not dating anyone. I am currently 26 years old. I really want a relationship but it scares the living shit outta me cuz I am scared to introduce them to my family. Now to tell you about my family, one is a drunkard abusive (father) another is submissive and I am no better and my sister doesn't seem to be doing anything to make her life. and I have a abusive piece of shit for a grandfather who curses and talking shit alot (by shit i mean accuses us of witchcraft calls us witch and threatens to kill every other day). and with that my will of living decrease by the speed of light. Honestly, every time i feel like I'm getting better or there is a relationship that have high potential of sailing. I just feel like there is a tumor in my lung that stop me from being in one. I am embarrassed by my so called family as it makes no progress over years. Our relationship is no better. Im scared that the shit that goes down in my family i would drag a p...